Are these guys patient or just stringing them along? As it turns out, there isn’t a lot of recent research on the courtship length prior to marriage.
Decades ago the statistics ranged from six to fourteen months.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: The fact that Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake did not end up together makes it difficult for me to believe in the institution of marriage at all. The fact that Mary Kay Letourneau and her former student (whom she started very illegally dating in 1996, resulting in jail time) are still together and happily married today, 18 years later. Then, there are Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom, who famously got married just one month after they met in 2009.
They were married for four years, which is 48 times longer than they knew each other before committing (and longer than many other couples who dated for "normal" amounts of time before getting engaged). Well, recently a friend of mine had that exact sort of giddy smile you get about one month into a new relationship. " in my head, while the other half screamed practical things, like "Pump the breaks!
Oh, and you can know what those faults are and enter into a marriage with open eyes about who you're really marrying. Here are some things that I think should happen before you decide to get engaged, regardless of how long it's been:—You should say "I love you" to one another, and mean it.—You should meet close friends and family members.—You should experience some sort of conflict to see how you both react to stress.—You should disagree about something.—You should know your partner's core as a person.—You should discuss your ideas about money, gender roles, and where you want to live.—You should feel in your gut that you can trust this person.—You should both come first to one another.—You should be able to speak openly and feel respected at all times.—You should feel comfortable about your sexual compatibility and both feel satisfied.
And you can discuss your values, and goals, and hopes and dreams, and both have the intention to stick things out if you run into trouble (which, in my opinion, is what marriage is all about vs. That said, is a month too soon to decide to commit to someone for life? I tend to think that achieving all of those things usually takes six months (at the least).
Even well into your thirties—when people are more self-aware than they were in their twenties and know what they want—and into your forties—when having kids starts to feel a bit more urgent—you can still afford to wait six months.
I asked my boyfriend to give me the guy's perspective on this, and he said he thinks six months should be the standard minimum too.
Here's the thing—you can know a person for years before you get engaged, be happily married for years after that, and then something bad can happen.I think it happened at the right time, though we would've loved to have been able to move in together right away instead of waiting a few months to buy a house together.This was both of our second marriages, so we knew what we wanted and did not want in a partner, no need to wait years.Couples who fell fast in love were engaged after nine months, and married after 18 months.These couples usually made it to their seventh anniversary before divorcing sometime later.I get asked a lot of relationship-themed questions given where I work, and one of them is from women with boyfriends who want to know how long to wait for the ring.